Do This Everyday
Tuesday, May 26, 2015
Real talk here... I'm exceedingly happy in my role as a mom, but in recent days I've been having these brief (thankfully passing) moments of dread that interrupt my contentment. Maybe not even dread, but a heaviness. Like a super duper mild version of the postpartum depression I suffered with Sisi. It's hard to put my finger on what or why. I think it has to do with the monotony of everyday life as a mom of two. My kids do so well with schedules and routines. Every day follows a somewhat predictable rhythm where I'm staying one step ahead of their hunger, fatigue, boredom and overstimulation. With Matteo, this routine is totally cyclical and happens 3 or 4 times a day- Wake up, nurse, diaper, play, nap. Wake up, nurse, diaper, play, nap. Over and over and over. Then I try to weave in Sisi's schedule as seamlessly as possible, and I find I'm always multitasking (which isn't really a strength of mine.)
babywearing at dinner is the norm. that means lots of food gets dropped on matteo's fuzzy little head. |
Don't get me wrong, this rhythm is good and keeps us all sane. I'd rather have repetitive days than crazy chaotic days. But I find that I myself don't have a routine for my own needs. My meals, my showers,my playtime, my naps are never regular and sometimes just don't happen. I've managed so far to be very zen about this- to breathe and tell myself that it's ok for my own life to be a little jumbled up right now if it means giving my kids a calm and balanced life. It's a worthwhile sacrifice.
But those moments of dread still creep up a few times a day, and I don't like them. I've decided to listen to that tight-chested feeling. I think it's telling me I need to make time for my own little routines. Comfort rituals. If I can make the time to do these few things every day, I will feel a little more cared for.
Morning rituals:
1. Brush teeth, use rose water toner (my fave! this stuff makes my face come alive, seriously. also, my pores are so small now) first thing in the morning. BEFORE I let the kids out of their rooms to start their morning rituals. As an HSP, the feeling of fuzzy teeth and an unwashed face REALLY bothers me. If I can take care of that first thing before I tend to my kids, I will feel one step ahead of the day.
2. Get dressed and do makeup. I've been pretty good about getting dressed thanks to my minimal wardrobe. I love everything in my closet and it's all comfortable, so it's not hard to pick something out for the day. My full makeup routine only takes 5 minutes because I prefer a really natural look, and I have a bare bones version (lip stain, powder, blush and curl lashes) that is good enough for days when I don't even have 5 mins to spare.
3. Make the bed (even if I know Sisi will mess it up later.)
4. Stroll in the garden in the morning. Sunshine is important for health and wellness, but morning sunshine between the hours of 8-11 is particularly beneficial. I don't know why, ask my husband. Anyway, morning sun just feels amazing on my skin and I love checking out the garden to see what flowers are blooming and which vegetables have popped up overnight.
Evening rituals:
Ok, the moment I've been waiting for. The kids are both tucked in, at least for a little while. The house is quiet, lights are dimmed. How should I spend this glorious hour or two before I fall into bed unconscious? The answer is not online shopping on amazon (so very tempting!)
5. Do a bit of yoga. Even if it's just a couple rounds of sun salutations. I sometimes feel like a hunchback with all the baby cradling, nursing, and bending down talking to tiny people I do each day. Yoga is the remedy.
6. Cup of tea. My favorite way to get hydrated before bed for those middle of the night feedings :) Right now I'm digging Tazo Spicy Organic Ginger.
7. Acknowledge the dogs' existence. I do feel bad that the dogs are my last priority right now. I don't have much energy left for them. But the least I can do is cuddle them and pet them for five minutes (and then immediately wash my hands because I've become very allergic to them since having kids).
8. Read. Preferably fiction. Feels so indulgent. My attention span for reading has grown so much since I stopped watching TV/movies. I go through a book a week at least.
9. Most importantly, kiss the hubby goodnight. Sometimes I'm so tired that I can't even make the effort to walk up to my husband and kiss him goodnight. That is soooo very sad. No more of that!
Morning rituals:
1. Brush teeth, use rose water toner (my fave! this stuff makes my face come alive, seriously. also, my pores are so small now) first thing in the morning. BEFORE I let the kids out of their rooms to start their morning rituals. As an HSP, the feeling of fuzzy teeth and an unwashed face REALLY bothers me. If I can take care of that first thing before I tend to my kids, I will feel one step ahead of the day.
2. Get dressed and do makeup. I've been pretty good about getting dressed thanks to my minimal wardrobe. I love everything in my closet and it's all comfortable, so it's not hard to pick something out for the day. My full makeup routine only takes 5 minutes because I prefer a really natural look, and I have a bare bones version (lip stain, powder, blush and curl lashes) that is good enough for days when I don't even have 5 mins to spare.
3. Make the bed (even if I know Sisi will mess it up later.)
4. Stroll in the garden in the morning. Sunshine is important for health and wellness, but morning sunshine between the hours of 8-11 is particularly beneficial. I don't know why, ask my husband. Anyway, morning sun just feels amazing on my skin and I love checking out the garden to see what flowers are blooming and which vegetables have popped up overnight.
Evening rituals:
Ok, the moment I've been waiting for. The kids are both tucked in, at least for a little while. The house is quiet, lights are dimmed. How should I spend this glorious hour or two before I fall into bed unconscious? The answer is not online shopping on amazon (so very tempting!)
5. Do a bit of yoga. Even if it's just a couple rounds of sun salutations. I sometimes feel like a hunchback with all the baby cradling, nursing, and bending down talking to tiny people I do each day. Yoga is the remedy.
6. Cup of tea. My favorite way to get hydrated before bed for those middle of the night feedings :) Right now I'm digging Tazo Spicy Organic Ginger.
7. Acknowledge the dogs' existence. I do feel bad that the dogs are my last priority right now. I don't have much energy left for them. But the least I can do is cuddle them and pet them for five minutes (and then immediately wash my hands because I've become very allergic to them since having kids).
8. Read. Preferably fiction. Feels so indulgent. My attention span for reading has grown so much since I stopped watching TV/movies. I go through a book a week at least.
9. Most importantly, kiss the hubby goodnight. Sometimes I'm so tired that I can't even make the effort to walk up to my husband and kiss him goodnight. That is soooo very sad. No more of that!
Curious- what are your must-do rituals every day? I love to hear about how women incorporate the simple pleasures of life into their hectic days. We are definitely worth it.
3 comments:
I love this.
My rituals are what we Aussies call a 'cuppa' (a cup-a-tea, or a cup-a-coffee, either works depending on how I feel), reading during Sam's feeds, standing out in the backyard and drinking in the quiet for even just 30 seconds, and using hand cream after the countless hand washings that happen every day with 2 kids in nappies and 3 little ones at home.
@lacey- yes! hand cream. i have lizard hands and feet. i smear that stuff all over my feet.
Going on a evening walk, especially in summer. My mom watches the boys and me and Nick just talk and walk. Heavenly
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